i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
