I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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