And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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