PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
