took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
