nut hugger
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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