I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
