Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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