is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
