You really coming over, don't trick.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
