West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
This can only be settled by a dance off.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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