You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
