Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
