Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
