what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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