i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize