I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
