Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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