i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
