drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
