I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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