why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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