did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
