dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize
