My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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