I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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