the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
smell my finger.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
The ass gains better be worth it
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