remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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