guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
