I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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