You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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