alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
These tits shall not be calmed
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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