I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
