69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
