I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize
