I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
