i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
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