I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Randomize
