Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
