yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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