Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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