Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
