OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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