I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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