I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
