He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
