Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize