I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Randomize
