Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Randomize
