just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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