it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
